Journey to life day 33 - Why should I do it?!

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have backchat in relation to fairness and my believe of what is fair when I have to do something that somebody else could have done

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when asked to do something become irritated and and angry  because I have to do it and want somebody else to do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to to become angry at the person who asked me to do it and then have thoughts about shouting at them why should I do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is not fair that I have to do it - but that somebody else must do it

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the anger and irritability I experience is because I so not want to do it - and out of that use backchat because I want someone else to do it

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that fairness doesn't exist - and that i have a created a perception of what is fair and not fair and. And if fairness really existed this world would not be what it is today

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that wanting somebody else to do it is ego - its me seeing myself as better than others and trying to assert authority just because i don’t want to do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be spiteful  in wanting somebody else to do it, because i want them go through the discomfort I went through

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that the answer for the question ''why should i do it'' is ''because im able to''. And that anything else is me wanting to abdicate responsibility and laziness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not to take responsibility but rather let somebody else take responsibility - not realizing that  in this i am without self direction and will in no way be able to sort out this world to make it a better place to live in but that i will always want somebody else to do it. And then when everybody wants somebody else to do it we end up with a world we see today...

I commit myself to when ask to do something stop the backchat and the anger and the irritability and the urge to say WHY ME

I commit myself to do something simply because I'm able to

I commit myself to do more than what is expected of me when i am able to

I commit myself to not use the excuse i have done it many times before its time you do it when i don't feel like doing something

I commit myself to see that the world is not fair and in that fairness doesn't exist  and so not use the excuse of 'its not fair'

I commit myself to let go the delusion that is my ego - to realize that as long as i have an ego i can never make a difference in this world but will always contribute to its abusiveness

I commit myself to stop the spitefulness that comes with wanting somebody else to do it - to want them to go though the discomfort I have - but to instead live my life so that no being will have to go through unnecessary discomfort