Day 116 - Being a RockStar

 

Sometimes when I listen to songs I image that i am the person who wrote the song and singing the song. I imagine i am playing in front of a huge stadium performing the song i am listening to. Mostly because it makes me feel good - when i was in school i u sed to do this allot - put the song on the hi-fi loudly and rock out in my room. I Liked doing this also, because I could really express what I felt by rocking out.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I listen to songs to imagine that I wrote the song and am singing it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to to imagine that i am performing this song live on stage rocking out in front of thousands of people

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to keep on imagining this, because it makes me feel good

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to imagine myself playing in front of allot of people and them liking me, because I want people to like me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in my want to be special and important to imagine myself being a rock star

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that i am inferior and thus i dream about play ing on stage where i will be better than everybody else

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that i do not need to be special or important or better than others, but that it is a believe than i must compete with other people.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to let go of these delusions and rather focus on my music to become more effective within it.

I commit myself to stop imagine that i wrote the songs i listen to when i did not

I commit myself stop imagining that I am playing in front of thousands of people when i listen to songs - i realize it is me wanting to be special that i do this

I commit myself to stop wanting to be special - instead I realize that nobody is special

I commit myself to stop wanting people to like me - I can see how fucked up i am inside which means other people are also fucked up inside and thus there is no point to want other to like me

I commit myself to let go of these delusions and to realize that by imagining  it i become lost in

my feelings and emotions constantly thinking about what ifs and dreams that are impractical.