Day 97 - Taking things Personally

 

You know - when someone someone comments on something about yourself and then you take it personally, blaming that person for your reactions to the words.

And when someone snaps at you and you react and take it personally by becoming angry as if someone did  wrong by you.

It is a belief that its the other person that has done something to you by snapping at you and calling names where you take it personally. But that is not true...

If I react in anger when someone tells me i am an idiot then it is I who reacts. The other person does not have special powers that control what i feel. I created the angler all by myself that I feel within myself. Therefor i cannot blame the other person for what i have created, because if when i take something personally then I myself take it personally

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to take things personally

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a character of taking the words/expression of another personally, where I will literally take what another says or does, out of context of the moment here and interpret it according to myself as a personality, based on memories and experiences of myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself  to when im in situations of conflict to believe that I am being attacked and thus take it personally and feel the need to defend myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the other person controls how I feel and that they are to blame for the reactions I feel within myself.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself myself to realize that i an the one who chose to take it personally and that i created the feelings and emotions and reactions and thus cannot blame the other person

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself myself to give the other person power over me and to make them as being authority when i react and take offence to what they say, not realizing that i created all of this

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be the directive principle in my life where i am not directed by others and where i stand strong in each moment here where i decide what moves within me

I commit myself to stop taking things personally

I commit myself to be the directive principle and stand as stability here in every moment

I commit myself to realize that I create the reaction and that choose to take things personally so I choose not to react

I commit myself to stop blaming the other person and believing he is attacking me and thus I need to defend myself, instead i simply don't throw the ball back and not participate in the game of anger and conflict and insults and gossip

I commit myself to stop giving my power away by giving in ad reacting and take things personally, instead i stop and realize that i am the one who creates how i feel and who i am in situations.

Moving the Stone from the Path - Would you?

 

When you walk on a road and hurt you foot by accidentally stepping on a stone/falling over a branch will you cry out in pain and anger - blaming the stone/branch for being in your way - or will you move out of the path to make sure nobody else gets hurt?

Its the same if you have a good life with no problems - wouldn't you want the same for others? or rather let them struggle and not find find ways to make the world a better place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider others and only act in self interest

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only look out for myself and never try to make life easier for others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not move the rock from the road to same sure nobody else gets hurt by it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that this world is a dog eat dog place and that there is nothing i can do to change it and that its just the way it is

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that saying that the world is every man for himself is me using it as an excuse and justification for not taking responsibility and assist and support others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to never put myself is the shoes of others and using the excuse and justification that it is not my responsibility an that they must find their own way to help themselves

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the only reason i can have a good life is because i have money - and that those without money have no change in this life to make it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that they do not have money, because they are lazy and don't get jobs - not realizing that there are 7 billion humans on earth and thus there is no way for all 7 billion to have jobs and money in this current accepted world

I commit myself to move the rock from the path/consider others

I commit myself to to not act in self interest, but to instead do what is best for all

I commit myself to stop the believe that this life is every man for himself and not accept this

find ways for all beings in earth to have a dignified life

I commit myself to stop using justifications and excuses like its not my responsibility, but to instead take self responsibility and make this world a world worth living

I commit myself to realize that it could have been me in that situation of suffering and poor and that no being should need to suffer and that we created this world and all its suffering and thus i commit myself to stop it

I commit myself to create a world where all beings can live a good  meaningful life without fear

Day 95 -Escapism and Game Addiction

 

Years ago I was heavily addicted to this one game. It completely took over my life. I liked it so much that i would go to bed late and wake up about 2 hours before I go to work just to pay the game. I was in a relationship that time and i spent so much time playing that game that i basically ignored the relationship which pretty much ended because of it.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to a game

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to in this addiction completely ignore the real world around me just so that i can have more time to feed my addiction

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become selfish in my need to 'get a fix' by doing what I can to make more time to play the game to satisfy myself and compromise others

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to give into this addiction and control my life where all i can think of is playing the game.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to feeling powerful as my game character levels up and keep playing the game to feel more powerful

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the feeling of accomplishment when I reach my goal in the game - not realizing that I feel as if I accomplish nothing in life and the game makes me feel better so I play it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the game as an escape from reality and as an distraction, because games are fun and easy - not realizing that I am running away from reality and not wanting to face life

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is the game that makes me feel powerful, not realizing that i am the one creating the feeling  within myself.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that addiction is something that happened to me - its caused by the game as if the game has power over me - not realizing that i created that addiction and I allowed myself to become addicted.

I commit myself to stop addiction by realizing that I created the addiction and that i have the power to stop it by choosing to stop it

I commit myself to realize that I ignored the world around me and escaped from it by playing games, because games are easier and fun whereas life is difficult - and that i cannot ignore the world around me. Instead I commit myself to make the world a better place

I commit myself to stop believing the power and accomplishment i feel when playing games to be real - and to realize that real power comes from changing within to become an effective being that is the directive principle in my life

I commit myself to stop all addictions as being addicted is me giving my power away and becoming depended on something outside myself

I commit myself to not become the picture below...

Holocaust Victims - Caused By Law Of Attraction?

 

This is a response to Abraham hicks - The Missing piece

In this video a guy is asking questions about the world and the suffering where Abraham hicks answers. She basically is a believer in the Law of attraction where all humans actually attract their own suffering.

What really alarmed me was when the guy asked about the Holocaust  where millions were killed and went through unimaginable suffering in which Abraham hicks generally avoided the question. She said that if each inner vibration is happy and joyful you will attract it and if you are miserable and paying attention to the suffering in this world then you will attract misery.

So what Abraham hicks is saying that the Jew Holocaust victims in a sense chose to be placed in gas chambers and the suffering they went through, because their inner experience didn't vibrate goodness and joy.

In this then what Abraham hicks is basically saying is that if a 5 year old girl gets kidnapped and raped its because she attracted it? Really? Also she said that you should not feel the pain others are feeling, because they are actually ok - they are coping with starving, raping, genocide so your pain is actually worse than theirs. Abraham hicks have no idea what it feels like being forced to kill your own mother and then forced to join in the children army where its kill or get killed. People like to believe that you should not feel pain for others and that they do not really feel so much pain, because it gives people an excuse not to actually do something about it. Its VERY easy to ignore something. All very CONvenient for the LOA people.

Its like a fire - there is a fire busy burning down your room - its a bad fire - so you choose to ignore it. The fire will not stop just because your not thinking about it, its going to burn down your house. Just like suffering in this world - if you keep on ignoring it it will simply continue!!!

The guy in answering the questions was right to question and had very practical valid points. Unfortunately Abraham hicks is very clever in avoiding and side stepping such questions. The Guy wanted answers to this world - he saw that LOA is not a solution to this world.

This is how LOA it works - always look at the behavior of what you are doing to see if it has an impact and always cross reference with the world:

You think happy thoughts, ignore bad ones and suffering - basically ignore the world. Make sure you feel happy so that you vibrate happiness and joy within yourself. Then your world becomes a happy place. YOUR world becomes a happy place. YOUR WOLRD ALONE!

Obviously if you ignore and suppress the real world everything will seem fine. The proof that LOA is not a world solution is right there on the news. The problems in the world are escalating, because nothing is being done. Its gets ignored by most people who believe they can change the world by feeling good. It does nothing. Look around you.

The world is in shit, because of those who were her before us. Because of us here now accepting the choices made by those who had the power to create the world system as it exist today. That we need money to survive - that a piece of paper, a number in a system has power over life and death. Without money you die - with money you live.

This is unacceptable - you will only change your perspective of YOUR own bubble you call your world with LOA, but The problems in this world sill still exist. You don't end starvation with feeling good - you end it with food.

Stop doing nothing and make permanent solutions to the world and all its suffering and abuse a reality - practical REAL solutions!!! Go to the Equal MONOEY website and join in on the creation of a new world like it should be. Be part of the change and give your ideas on solutions to the worlds problems and share it others.

Day 93 - Self Support, Worthiness, Life

 

We create our life from the choices we make. Obviously you need money to able to live to be able to make choices.

In my previous blog I wrote about how I do not support myself - where i would rather help others. But what i have noticed is that I do support myself by supporting others - in supporting others you learn allot about yourself and who you are. But I always see others as more than i am.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to when my mother died make the choice to see life as pointless and in this not worth the pain that comes with it and thus see myself as worthless and my life pointless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to find meaning in life by assisting and supporting them so that they do not go through the pain I felt and completely ignoring myself

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to in fear of loosing people to assist and support them so that I do not leave me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as unworthy and thus not worth supporting myself

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see other people as more than i am and that they need saving and thus create the savior character to help them with their problems

I forgive myself that i have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that me helping others was my attempt to help myself, because i could se myself in others and thus i was not doing it got them but for me.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see others as superior to me - because I believe I am unworthy

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to secretly want others to help me, because I believe that i cannot help myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame life for me being depressed and seeing myself as undeserving, inferior and unworthy - believing it to be a consequence from when my mother died

I forgive myself that i have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I was seeing MYSELF as being unworthy, I believed are more than ME, that i created this experience and belief by choosing it.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I do no harm and that it is fine to just not support myself in becoming an effective human - not realizing that I can only support people to a point - and if i want to be effective i will first have to support myself and dedicate myself so that i will be able to support and assist people more effectively and thus teaching them how to support themselves and start creating a pattern - its starts with me. By not doing this i deny others a chance to see 

I commit myself to realize that we as humans have created a life that is actually pointless and that we have become unworthy of life by abusing life and causing suffering - and that we must undo this by making it a point in life to stop abusing life so that we may become beings of true worth.

I commit myself to stop using others as an excuse not to support and move myself by supporting and moving myself and to stop the fear of loss - death is part of life and there is no need to fear life

I commit myself to stop wanting other to support me when i am unwilling to so for myself - and to instead support myself

I commit myself to realize that I am the creator of my life and how i experience myself in situations and that I have the power to decide - nothing else is to blame for something I created

I commit myself to take self responsibility for myself by supporting myself and in that support others to do what is best for all and in that changing the world

Day 92 - Supporting Self

 

I did some introspection today and had a look at who I am and what I do. And what came up is support. If I look at this I see that i am effective in supporting the farm for example working outside and learning how to do things.

I have been able to support others in learning the things I have learned. But when I look at how I support myself - I simply do not. I support others, but I do not support myself. I see others as being more important than I am and I would always place others needs above my own.

Now i have to ask why am I doing this? Why do I see myself as less than others? Why do i se them as being worth more than i am. Its because i see myself as being less important. I believe myself to be unworthy.

In my previous posts I explained the point of working through understanding. I do work around the farm, because i understand the need for the particular task that im doing. For example planting a fruit tree - so that we can have our own fruit in the future. Even mundane things like pulling weeds for the day - to make sure that the grass or vegetables or fruit trees can grow effectively. I support others with what i learned so that they also have the know how and be educated. I understand the importance of it.

This is where my problem is - that I do not se the importance of supporting myself. Id rather support other people. I do support myself to some extend but not in the same capacity that i do with outside work where I go for being most effective in what i do. When it comes to supporting myself I always do it half assed or not at all.

Back when I was in high school and i got sick - I got very sick. I remember I went on holiday visiting old friends i got very sick. I still continued partying and smoking - i eventually got to the doctor who said i had bronchitis and a throat  infection. I still continues partying and smoking and even swimming in the Atlantic ocean(very cold). Every time i got sick i never showed it - only when i am so sick that i cannot walk and am in too much pain will I stay in bed. An example of how I do not care about myself. Did not support myself.

And this behavior is from when my mother died - that really did a number on me and here is another point that still dictated my life. When she died I made allot of choices subconsciously - including that i am not worthy or important and i do not care about myself. 

Self support - I will continue this tomorrow. Its important 

Day 91 - Fearing Others and hiding

 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear  other people will hurt me

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to in this fear hide myself from others and withdraw and avoid meeting new people

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear other people seeing who i am and knowing me, because they might not like me and judge me

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear being exploited by other people where i will judge myself as being stupid

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear others taking advantage of me and being used

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear that if I share who i am that i will be vulnerable and thus weak

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see being vulnerable as being weak and that i must be a strong manly person by closing myself off as to protect myself

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to in this fear of others to become silent so that people cant have the chance to know me and thus cant hurt me

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to when i see all the bad things in this world where people kill,exploit, manipulate etc others to then close up and hide myself from others so that I can be protected

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that nobody can deceive, manipulate, exploit and take advantage of me unless i allow it - and that it is not something I should fear, but rather be aware of.

I forgive myself that i have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that there is no need to protect myself or fear sharing myself to those who i trust and have proven that trust

I commit myself to stop fearing that others will hurt me and realize that there are people in this world who hurt others, but i cannot live my life in fear of this and being directed by it. Instead I am aware of this, but no longer allowing this fear to close me up

I commit myself to stop hiding myself form others and to stop fearing meeting new people, instead i embrace the opportunity to meet new people to asses my effectiveness

I commit myself to stop fearing being exploited and taken advantage of and to realize that this can only happen if i allow it and to instead become effective within myself so that i can see when someone want to exploit and take advantage of me and direct it accordingly

I commit myself to become vulnerable and to stop seeing it as being weak and to realize that I have created this believe that being vulnerable is weakness. Instead vulnerability is more like being open where I do not have anything to hide and no fear, because I am the directective  principle in my life 

I commit myself to Stop living the silent type character out of fear of others, but to instead express myself

I commit myself to stop the belief that I have to protect myself  and steel myself from everybody in order to keep me safe from them hurting me and to instead realize that if i hide myself from everybody then i will never change or become effective in this world