Day 187 - Not being Good with people - The Silent Type...

 

Today I ran into somebody and said hello and the usual greetings. I notice that I am always uncomfortable in these situations and usually simply smile and find ways to end the conversation. I have always been “the silent type” and was never really good at meeting new people. I have defined myself as being the strong silent type and told myself it’s a “lifestyle choice”. That is a very nice way to hide from the fact that I am not good with people, because I never really worked on this point or developed the skills in order to be effective with people.

What happens then is that when I run into somebody I know the uncomfortable feeling I have is not knowing how to handle myself in this particular situation. I see other people being al relaxed and genuine when in the same situation, like it is natural and then I would judge myself for not being so natural and ask myself why I cannot do this. The answer is simple – I never taught myself how. I have the tools to do this and it is time to start.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be uncomfortable when running into someone I know

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to investigate the reason why I am uncomfortable and to simply accept it as a part of me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as being the silent type – not realizing that I did this, because I was not good/effective with people.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to work on becoming good/effective with people and push through to make it happen.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the uncomfortable feeling I have is because of thoughts and feelings and the belief that I have created that I am not good with people

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I meet/greet people to allow thoughts and feelings to direct me and then want to end the conversation based on that instead of not allowing myself to be direct and to direct myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to even before I go to the person to meet/greet them create anxiety within myself, because I am already thinking about how I am going to do this and remember that I am not good with people.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to stop the thoughts and feelings and not to participate in the moment with the mind.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to breathe and be here in the moment focusing on what I am doing right now when I meet people – within this I realize that doing this removes all that unnecessary bullcrap that complicate things from the equation and give me the opportunity to actually participate within what I am doing.

I commit myself to stop defining myself as being the silent type and not good with people – instead I push myself to practice and develop a natural expression in order to be effective with people.

I commit myself to stop participating in thoughts and feelings and beliefs when I meet/greet people that I define as being uncomfortable – Instead I breathe and be here in the moment focusing on what I am doing

I commit myself to stop wanting to end conversations based on how I feel at the moment – Instead I Direct myself and don’t allow feelings and thoughts to direct me