Day 285 How do you expand your comfort zone?

 

I wrote previously on how some of us get stuck in our ways, in doing things a specific way and always following the same patterns. Another point that comes from this is never trying something new that is outside your comfort zone.

In our lives we have created zones. And in our comfort zones we like to stay. Anything that might bring us out of these comfort zones we will stay away from. For example for me personally my comfort zone is being by myself and stepping out of that comfort zone is being around allot of people.

The problem with comfort zones is that if you stay there you will never expand yourself. You will stay the same, because you keep on doing the same things and never venture out to explore new things. Sometimes opportunities present themselves to me, they come along and then I have an option to choose – but sometimes these opportunities will take me out of my comfort zone and thus I will not take it and rather let it pass.

That is why the comfort zone can be so dangerous to stay in. The point is to not be stuck in your comfort zone, but to expand the comfort zone. But before you can expand it you need to first step out of it. If I use my example again, being around allot of people is outside my comfort zone, so what I do is put more effort to engage in large groups where possible so that I can learn to become more comfortable around a group of people. Then what happens is that I will eventually build confidence and become comfortable and thus I would have expanded my comfort zone.

It’s like this with all things. We really like our comfy zones and do not want to get out of it. It’s like being in a nice and warm bed and needing to wake up, but it’s so cold and dark outside and you really just want to stay in the nice and warm bed. Wake up and get up – Expand that comfort zone. Life Begins and the end of your comfort Zone

Day 284 - Stuck in old ways

 

There seems to be a point in your life, especially as you get older, where the prospect of doing something differently or trying something new is met with a sense of contempt. This is partly due to the belief that as you get older you get wiser, therefor you have lived and know what works and what doesn’t, so when someone wants to try and change the way you do things you tend to become really stubborn.

So can you teach an old dog new tricks?

The question is why do people become so closed to new ideas and new way of doing things? Or trying to do something differently than what you normally do? Why is the reaction to change met with scorn?

You can see this especially in older people, this gets worse the older you get. I remember when I was a kid I used to make fires for cooking meat allot. And one time we were ate a get together and a person was trying to a fire started, but the wood was a little damp and he was struggling and becoming really frustrated. So I’m seeing this and went over to help him and suggested that he should blow on the flames to get the fire going. Now understand this is an adult and I’m a young kid, and he has been struggling with this fire for a while now – he looks at me and said “ YOU try and blow on it” and then left. Can’t remember what happened next.

The point is that sometimes we get so stuck in doing things one way that we do not even want to consider that there is another way to do things. And whenever someone comes along to help or assist you with a new suggestion you immediately react with scorn and ignore what they said to keep doing things YOUR way.

Don’t be so closed Minded. Open yourself up to new things. We need to ne ok with trying something new once in a while. Maybe there is another way or more effective way of doing something, so don’t close the door on new suggestions, try it out. Expand your life and realize that you do not know everything.

Day 283: Having a Bad Day? The problem might be 'Thinking'...

Today I had what we call a ‘Bad day’. One those days where it goes on and on and on and where you wish you can simply skip the day and not have to live through it. I am now at the end of this so called ‘bad day’ and looking back it wasn’t actually a such ‘bad day’ and I made it far worse than it really was. So why did I create such a bad day for myself? What caused this?

It all started the day before, where I started to plan my day and already saw it’s going to be a full day of relatively hard work for me. Here I already created the experience of ‘ it’s going to be a looong day’. I planned the day ahead with time estimates and when I’m going to do what. My day started with an unfortunate event where I spent time tying off an area for the horses – it was unfortunate, because I tied of the wrong area and had to undo what I did. Here the first thing that came up was” SEE, I KNEW IT WAS GOING TO BE A BAD DAY!”. I brought the thought and idea I created the day before into this moment to validate it and make it real.

From that point on every little thing that went a little wrong irritated me more and more. The weather report said it was going to be nice and cool day, which would have made raking up a field for hay for the horses a bit easier. Instead it turned out to be a hot day. When we were done with the hay I was quite tired, but still had quite a few things on my schedule before this day was up. And I went through all those tasks with the experience of “ im having a bad day”.

The things that happened today are not something new. Many a time the weather changes, or I have to totally redo something or things don’t go as planned. What made this day so bad is that I already created and decided how I am going to face and experience this day before I went to bed. The problem was that I allowed one thought to direct my whole day and only now at the end of the day did I see this.

This is something I could have totally avoided if I simply directed that single thought. This is why it’s so important to slow yourself down and watch for these thoughts. How many thoughts do we have running around in our heads undirected? Very problematic when one single thought can affect my day to such an extent. – imagine what many thoughts can do? Teach yourself how to direct these thoughts and become the director of your life

Day 282: Your Journey to Self-Empowerment:

 

I’m pretty sure if you are asked if you would like to empower yourself the answer will be a very definite YES! I mean, who would not want self-empowerment? The funny thing is though that we tend to not realize what Self-empowerment means, we do not understand the most important part of this which is not the “empowerment”, but the SELF.

For me I would say that empowering yourself is probably one of the most difficult things you will face, because empowering yourself means changing yourself. It’s not like you will have somebody else doing it for you – it’s going against who you think you are and what you believe you can and cannot do. It’s a tough road, but when you get to the other side it is well worth it.

One example I can give is that many years ago I was the very definition of the word lazy. With anything that remotely resembles work was met with a large amount of reluctance from me. I disliked work and always whenever possible did the bare minimum to get the task done. This all changed when I started this process of self-empowerment and self-discovery.

For those who were or are lucky enough to live on a farm will know one thing – There is always allot of work to be done. So when we first got the farm we started with the planning. Fences needed to be replaced, trees needed to be planted, horse grazing areas needed to be prepared so it’s safe etc. So as we were planning the usual resistance I faced when seeing work to be done grew as per usual. I really did not want to do it lol. Not just that – I had no idea how to do the stuff, I have never done it before so I was clueless on how to do this.

At that point I faced a choice – do what I usually do and give in to the resistance and stay the same lazy person as I always have been, or make the choice to change myself and not allow my reluctance and resistance to work direct me. And I simply made chose the latter.

That was the easy part – even though it took me most of my life to get to that choice. What I found is that it’s an everyday commitment I make to myself. Change happened over time, its take patience and dedication and consistency. The more I pushed through the resistance to ‘work’ and instead did what needed to be done it became easier over time.

Sure at times I really did not feel like it, but that is where decline comes in and the understanding of the importance of what I was doing. In the end it became like an understanding. I understood the need for what I was doing. For example replacing old rusted barbed wired fencing with new animal safe fencing. It eventually did not even become “work”, but more something that needed to be done and so I did it.

This Journey is not easy, but if I back then did not make the choice to change I would have probably still be the same lazy person as I have always been going through life a slave to my resistance, instead I chose to empower myself.

Thanks for reading

Day 281: How to do something you really don’t want to do…

 

An Introduction:

 

This is something we all struggle with even from early childhood. Our parents will tell us to do our chores or in school when we have to do our homework. From Waking up early in the morning to get ready for work or ticking things off from a “To do list”. We tend to really not want to do these things, but in the end it’s something we have to do and so we reluctantly do these things based on necessity.

I often ask myself why it is that our natural reaction towards not wanting to do something is to simply not do it – even when we understand the need for it. Why is it that we allow ourselves to be directed by this “ I don’t want to”. Why does this resistance we face have so much power over us where it will completely take over our choices and we end up simply doing nothing?

I do not have a simple answer for this. I have seen how this “ I don’t want to” destroy people’s lives. Where they stood with a choice: Self-empowerment or Self sabotage and ended up with sabotaging their lives by continuously giving in to this “resistance” when they faced with something they did not want to do.

The big problem is that it’s naturally easier to simply do nothing. It’s effortless really. And by doing nothing then nothing changes, no movement, no self-change, no self-empowerment. Your life just stays the way it is. Now, here there with some people there is a want for something different. There is a want for a better way of living and a want for change in their lives – but when it comes to the actual doing and taking the steps towards self-change and self-empowerment the first thing they face is resistance and this is where most fall. They don’t push through and eventually give into the resistance and fail.

For those few who have made a change in their lives for the better only did one thing differently – when they faced the resistance they did not allow it to direct them. This is a very important step. When you make the choice to change – you are making a commitment to yourself. Those who have indeed changed themselves for the better made this commitment for themselves and simply kept to it no matter what.

In the end that is the only difference between those who have made change to those who fall and give up. There is no magical solution and there is no easy way out. Making the choice to change is something that most people do not want to do, but some do see the need for it and it’s those people who will face a choice.

And when you do make the commitment and choice to change what will you do when you face the resistance? Will you push through or will you fall?

Day 280: Just who exactly is the Real You?

 

 

“The Fascination with the Mind is Mirrored within the Fascination with Movies – Watching the Reels Play. In the Mind you’re a Superhero that Understands things that makes ‘You Special’, where you have ‘Special Skills’ and ‘Special Gifts’. But none of those are in fact Real. They’re just a Movie Reel where you Hide. But, even the ‘You’ that’s Hiding, the one Lost in the Mind – isn’t Real: it’s a Character you Created about You…one of Many.

You have Characters for every Situation, for every Relationship and everything you do. And each Character has different Reasons, Meanings and Values – and you will Dress-up as these Characters in Ways that will Ensure that ‘Your Movie’ Benefits. And ‘Your Movie’ Benefits if you do not have to take Responsibility for the Real Reality.” - http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2013/01/day-263-real-eyes-see-reel-thoughts.html

We have created specific characters and personalities for specific situations. Have a look at the people in your life and how you are around each of them. Are you the same or do you change into a different person depending on the situation?

For me when I am in town buying things and interactive with different people I usually become a super friendly character, simply because people are more willing to help you when you are friendly. Another example would be when I was a kid, my behavior would be different depending where I am and who I speak with. I would be different when speaking to a parent or when I’m in church or when I’m with friends. I had many characters for every situation.

And so do we all – we are many characters. We have a character for anger, for frustration, for irritation, for when we do not agree with someone, for when we do not want to do things – really a character for every situation. The question then is who exactly are we really? Look at when you are alone – is that who you really are? Or are we constantly in our minds thinking about the day, thinking about other people, judging other people , creating our own opinions and ideas and beliefs on what we see and wonder around in our imaginations. None of those things are real, it’s all fake.

Look outside. Look at the trees, the grass and the sky. Those things are real. The forests being destroyed, that is real. The oceans being poisoned, the mass extinction of species – those things are real and the real consequences of humanities imaginations. The result of our desires and greed and quest for happiness – the human lifestyle has created so much real destruction.

It’s time we become real and let go of these characters we have created, because these characters and personalities is keeping us all preoccupied from real change. There is unfortunately allot at stake and time will eventually run out. And when it does run out in the end, what will we say, what will you say? Did we do everything we can with the time we had? Or did we waste it all on our imaginations….

Day 279- Why do we choose to create bad experiences???

 

Ever had the experience where you need to do something for the day and you don’t feel like doing it, but when the time comes to do it and your busy with it you find it’s not actually that bad? So why then did you think it’s going to be crappy and why did you not want to do it to begin with?

For example when I was in school and the teacher gave me homework. Throughout the day I would be like totally not looking forward to doing the homework. The more I would think about just how unpleasant it would be the more I would not want to do it and the more I postpone. Some days I would even simply not do it, and the next day I would cram it in quickly before class starts. Other days when I finally push through the resistance and just get to it I found it was actually not that bad. It was not as unpleasant as I thought it would be. So what made me think that it would be bad?

The problem comes with the thinking part. When you have something do to for the day we often start thinking about how it would be doing it – this is mostly based on past experiences. We think about times we did a similar thing before and where it was unpleasant or the bad experiences we had with particular task. For example homework – I would think about all the times I had to sit and struggle with homework and how time consuming it was and how it kept me from things I liked – I would take all of that and project it onto the homework that I need to do later that day.

Also thinking about it we already create the disdain and resistance towards the task ahead by linking it to past experiences. We already create the experience before we even get to the task. So looking at it it’s not the task that makes you not want to do it – you created the “bad” experience even before you started.

This is actually a very unnecessary experience, because we cannot know exactly what we will experience when doing the task that lies ahead of us. It will always be based on past events and assumptions formed from beliefs and ideas, but the fact remains – I will not know unless I actually do it.

Next time when there is something that you need to do, but don’t want to or feel like doing know this – by thinking about how bad it will be you actually create more resistance towards the task and create the bad experience you will have. This can be applied to anything you do. In the end the best thing to do is to stop the thoughts about how crappy it will be – stop creating the experience. Stop the thoughts and when the time comes to do this task simply do it. Stay out of your head be here and get it done and move on. Wouldn’t live be much simpler when we realize that we create how we experience ourselves…