Day 165 - Being stuck

 

 

Today I am going to have a look at the word stuck.

I looked at the experience of myself and this is one of the words that came up – there is a feeling of being stuck, no flow. How is it possible to feel stuck within self?

The only way to be stuck is when you do not move. When you face the same points over and over again, but never overcome them. Also when you keep on falling on the same points and when you do not change. When you keep on giving in and giving up and not pushing through. Then there is a feeling of being stuck.

Within this I am the one who created this experience. I alone am responsible for this, thus I am the one able to stop this this experience of being stuck. The question is then how?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an experience of being stuck within myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am unable to move past this point and that I lack the power and ability

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I am the one who created this and thus I am responsible for it and within this it is up to me to move past the experience of being stuck

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to come up with any and all excuses not to get myself unstuck and start moving – not realizing that there is no valid excuse and all these excuses I have made is me not allowing myself to  push through the resistances.

I forgive myself that I have accepted not and allowed myself to realize that being stuck is actually me not moving

I forgive myself that I have accepted not and allowed myself to push through the resistances I face so that I can stop the feeling of being stuck by moving myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted not and allowed myself to realize that If I keep on giving up and giving in I create a repeating pattern /Timeloop and the points will keep coming until I make the choice to stop this pattern by moving past it

I forgive myself that I have accepted not and allowed myself to realize that this experience of being stuck will always be with me unless I do something to change myself to be able to move past this experience of being stuck

I commit myself to stop creating the experience of being stuck – instead when I am stuck at a particular point I investigate the reason why and find a way how to move past it

I commit myself to stop the belief and idea that I am unable or lack the power to get myself unstuck – Instead I use the tools ( i.e. writing) to put myself in a position to get myself moving again

I commit myself to stop using excuses – instead I realize that There is no excuse to not get myself moving

I commit myself to stop giving in and giving up when I face resistance – instead I realize that If I do not move through the resistance I will create the experience of being stuck so I commit myself to push myself to move past the resistances

I commit myself to stop the repetitive pattern of stukcness by changing myself so that I do not fall on the same points over and over again

Purification of Time

 

The Sun - a great fusion reactor, ball of fire. The light hits the earth providing energy for nature, for the whole earth. And so with the rotation of earth and the light from the sun we have a measurable, mathematical, indefinite continued progress of existence and events  - or in simpler terms, Time.Time has become an integral part of our lives, with our lives/living that rotates around time. We live according to time, we work according to time and we sleep according to time. We plan our day according to time - something we created and placed importance in.

Time for me also plays a role in my life. I have schedules and appointments and other considerations that revolves around time. It is a way to organize my life.When I was  In School and when in class - there was too much of it (time) and after school for the day there was not enough Time. On the farm There never seems to be enough of it and I have had reactions regarding time.

With so many things to do, it seems like there is never enough time to get to it all. This would cause a state of anxiety within myself and also made me irritable at times. I was frustrated, because I could not get to everything since there was not enough time during the day to get to it all. When I looked at the time I would feel different depending on what time it is. In the morning it is fine, in the afternoon I see my time is getting less, which causes anxiety and frustration at times and by night time its like ''shit, the day is almost over and I did not get to do all the things I wanted, dammit!''.

So within this Time, decides who I am and what I do and how I feel, but time does not really exist - its simply nature moving that we equated and allowed to direct who we are. I am the one creating the energetic experience in regards to time in my Mind. I am the one creating the feelings and reactions and beliefs in regards to time making it more than what it is.

I forgive myself that I ha ve accepted and allowed myself to get anxious when I see time goes by, fearing I would not get enough time for finish my tasks for the day

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel different depending on what time it is and within that, change who I am depending on what time it is - allowing time to decide who I am, not realizing that I am not the directive principle of who I am within the tasks that I do with accepting and allowing my reactive relationship to time in the mind to dominate/direct me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have thoughts and backchat in relation to Time where I would react and allow the thoughts and backchat to generate feelings and emotions like frustration and anger, because there is so much to do and not enough time. Not seeing, realizing and understanding how I would within this – actually then create a whole personality-relationship to time in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in my frustration of never getting to everything and not having enough time, to become irritable and act out my irritation on others around me. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see time as something more than me, something that directs me and something that I should follow and allow to dictate my life - not realizing that Time is simply nature moving, a point of universal reference within which to practically categorize/organize responsibilities according to minutes/hours/days/weeks/months/years etc.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that although time is a part of our life - it should not be something that directs me and changes who I am.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to remain stable and consistent no matter what time it is - within this realize that if I do my best and all that I am able to with the time I have then there is no point to worry about Time since I cannot make Time stop or squeeze out more time from somewhere and/or timetravel.

I commit myself to stop going into anxiety and fear when I look at the time, instead I breathe and stop the thoughts of ''there is not enough time'' and stop worrying about it - realizing that if I do my best with the time I have its impossible to do more.

I commit myself to stop getting frustrated and angry when I see I did not get to everything this day - instead I realize that there is in fact another day tomorrow and the day after that to do what I need to do

I commit myself to stop allowing Time to dictate and decide who I am, instead I remain stable no matter what the time is

I commit myself to realize that time is a reference point that is here that I can use to organize my life effectively and not something to react to.

I commit myself to stop the fear that time is running out - instead I realize that although Time is going by it is nothing to fear and rather to do the best I can with the time I have here on earth