Day 145 - Sensitivity to Sensibility

 

I am a sensitive person. Being a sensitive personality and character is what i have accepted myself to be. I am sensitive to pain - small things like scratches and especially pimple squeezing is quite painful for me. You can say i have low pain threshold. Interestingly when it comes to big pains like going fast downhill on a skateboard and loosing balance falling off and rolling and skidding on a tar road getting some serious road rash - I can handle.

I’ have also been sensitive to emotions and  feeling my whole life - I easily got affected. Also with conflict situations, because i was so sensitive towards it I would avoid it because I could not handle it.

This is a accepted behavior that I have made part of my life, but if I am allowing myself to be easily affected my situations and directed by it then I am not the directive principle in my life. I must be able to stand in every and all situations and not be affected or afflicted or directed by it. I must be the directive principle and not be sensitive, but be sensible. Sensitivity to sensibility.

I am not talking about being a ''macho man'' or masculinity. I am talking  Facing any and all points that come my way. Not giving into fear, but facing it head on no matter what. Real Strength is standing no matter what. And that is a difficult concept, because we get easily side tracked. It requires going against your own beliefs and perceptions and idea of yourself. It is so much easier to belief that I lack the power to do this - that I am not strong enough. But i am the one who created that idea of myself in the first place.

Sensitivity to sensibility

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be a sensitive person

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create within myself and participate in the sensitive character.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to so easily be affected by situations and not be able to handle myself well

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid conflict situations, because I  believe myself to be too sensitive to handle it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create the idea and belief that I am a sensitive person and thus be directed by emotions and feelings and situations and thus not able to stand strong

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I lack the power and strength to stand in any and all situations not realizing that i am the one who created this belief despite everything that i have overcome thus far that proves i have the strength

I commit myself to stop being sensitive, instead I go from sensitivity to sensibility

I commit myself to stop the belief that I lack the strength and power to stand no matter what. instead i realize that I had the power all along and the proof is in all the times i did stand and overcame situations I thought never possible.

I commit myself to realize that although there are new challenges that come my way that may seem like it is bigger and tougher and too much  for me to handle - they are not. I stand and breathe through trusting that I am able and have the strength to move past it - this can only make me stronger.

I commit myself to stop being so ''thin skinned'', but instead give myself the skin of a rhino to be able to handle any situation.

i commit myself to when i am in a situation and react to it in a sensitive way. I stop and breath and be sensible - be aware of what I am doing and not allow myself to be directed by feelings emotions or situations, but instead i direct it