Day 71 - ''I'll do anything to fit in'' Character

 

This is related to when i was in school. Where i would change my behavior just so that i can fit in with other people so that they can accept me. So i would compromise myself and who i am so that i can keep my friends and then i change who i am and believe this character is real.

Peer pressure. You can look back in your life and realize that everybody does the same thing - they change themselves to fit in. I was a deferent person depending on who i am with. I would be the 'goody two shoes' character when im around my parents, teachers, friends parents and then a deferent person when im around my friends and then a deferent person when im arou nd a beautiful girl i like.

In this as i look back i ask myself who was I? Who was the real me? When i look at how i was when i was alone with myself i was again another person/character. When i was alone with myself there was no need to change. That was the person who i really was. But i alone knew that and how i presented myself to others was fake and not real. Simply characters so suit my life and the particular situation I was in.

Now i have to ask myself who was I friends with? The person i was friends with was also another character and not a real person. It was somebody like me who chose to be a particular character depending on who they were with. And everybody is like that, a bunch on characters.

Nobody was real - nobody revealed who the really are just like I hid myself from others. And i did this out of fear. We do this out of fear. The fear of not being accepted by others - the fear others not liking who you really are, The fear of others judging who you are.

I find it interesting that I never saw myself as being fake/nor real. I thought i was real. Everybody think they are real. We all believe that this person and character is who we are. But if i was real then who i was would never change. I would not create different characters around different situations, I would be consistent in who I am and what I do no matter the situation or who i am with.

And so I chose and created my characters and became friends with characters that i liked, in this lived a lie - it wasn't real. Who is the real me. Who are you?

This is why I am busy with getting rid of all the characters i have created, because i realize now that it was all a act. I need to become real - find the real person. We all need to become real. To Keep it real 

 

More on dropping the act an becoming real tomorrow. While you anxiously wait for part two go here and vote for a real world at www.equalmoney.org

And then also if you want to become real and stop acting start by going here: www.desteni.org