Day 325: Is Thinking the big cause of our inner pain?

What if all our personal problems can be traced back to thoughts? What if all that is needed is to stop the thoughts? There is a power in thoughts most of us do not yet realize, especially to what extent we are directed by it.

www.desteniiprocess.com

 

Day 306 - The Power Of Silence

There is the Power in Silence that many are not Aware of  - Use it:

Day 286: Relationships – Why this Desire will be the end of you.

 

I  know the title may sound a tad bit dramatic, but so is life so sit back and relax and continue reading – you just might learn something. We all have this – the desire to be with someone. It becomes more prominent in our teenage years where most of that time is spent on chasing or finding “ THE ONE”. I know I had my fair share of chasing and trying to find somebody to love. It’s a dangerous thing really – Desire - and I’ll show you why.

Desire is something that will completely direct and control your life. Desire is such a feel good feeling that we simply give into without much fight. Desire is something that will override any common sense or particular principles you live by – you simply forget all of that and follow the desire no matter where the road ends. That is what makes Desire so dangerous – you lose direction in your life by giving in to desire.

I’m sure many of us had those moments – where the point of desire stares you right in the face and all you have to do is give in, lean in and grab it – no matter the consequences. And at that moment all common sense fades away and it just feels right.

For me it was a girl, a long time ago. You know the story: Boy meets girl, they become best friends, after time they become more. The only twist was that the girl had a boyfriend. Now I am what you would call a nice guy. I always saw myself as a person who would not date a girl who already has a boyfriend, but my desire showed me otherwise. I remember what went through my head – what made me do it. This desire for relationships simply took over any reasoning or common sense or morals or principles I lived by – I simply said F**k that and gave in. And so began a secret behind the scenes relationship rooted from desire.

So that’s a simple example of Desire. The problem with Desire and what makes it so dangerous is that it’s something we really really want. We do not want to look at it objectively and let it go when we know it will not benefit our lives or who we are. Instead we want to chase that desire, that feel good feeling. When it comes to the desire for relationships – we meet someone and we really want to make it work – simply because we desire having a relationship. What most do not see here is that it’s not the other person they actually like, but it’s the idea of having a relationship that they are after. So in the end it has very little to do with the actual person you found, but rather its all about having the desire of relationship fulfilled.

And that is no way of actually living – chasing this desire or idea of relationship. Would it not be better if it was real? Curing aloneness is not by being with somebody else. Chasing relationships is not the answer to filling the emptiness you feel. The first step is getting to know yourself, and being comfortable with yourself, and caring for yourself and loving yourself.

A real relationship has nothing to do with fulfillment or desire – it’s taking responsibility for another being and supporting them to be the best they can be. Now, what does that mean exactly? Let us see the answer in the next blog

Day 158 - Uselessness

 

I Have touched on the subject in my other blog post of me seeing myself as weak and not strong in my previous post, Before I continue with that I’'m going to write about another point that came up within that which is uselessness.

Its been almost 9 months since my first symptoms started of the Grave disease that I have. Before that I have been mostly busy with physical work. That was what I did during my days - got physical with the earth and I enjoyed it and got quite good at it. I have been unable to do any physical work for almost 6 months now and going from being outside doing physical work to being inside the house was a massive change to my schedule. It was like a whole new world and a new chapter in my life. People had to take over from me the things I used to be able to do and within that I felt useless. Some people would have liked the experience of others doing your bidding (lol), but I did not. I had this experience and energetic reaction within myself whenever I had to ask someone to assist me which was in part the reason for my previous post on hurting my back.

Basically I felt useless, because I could not do what I usually did and was good at - that took me time effort to become effective within it which also brought up anger towards myself for the situation I placed myself in. What I did not realize is that I have been doing things for other people that did not have the time as well as other important things. Although they are not physical work I have not been in fact useless and it is just a belief I had. Now that I have been feeling better I started to take on more responsibility and activities - all new experiences for me so that has been cool.

The most labour intensive task I do now is probably the most difficult thing I have ever done and struggle with greatly is.....cleaning. Seriously - I would clean the one day and by the next day I question my sanity, because the house is dirty again and I could have sworn I cleaned it the previous day. At least with mixing cement, throwing concrete and building walls once your done its done and stays that way for many, many years. With cleaning its like I'm getting nowhere. I feel a bit sorry for my parents who had to clean up after me all those years ago. So yes - I learn new things and thus expanding on all that My abilities so that one day I can say - I have done it all.

Back to my original point. A big change came upon my life and I looked at it negatively and saw it as Grave and the end of my world, But it was just the beginning of a new chapter bringing new opportunities.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am useless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become angry, because I believed I was useless just because I was not able to do anything that I used to do

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have an energetic reaction and thoughts of 'I'm useless' whenever I had to ask someone to do something for me that I used to do.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to unconditionally accept the support that was given to me and instead be irritated when someone offered help, because I saw me being unable to do it as me being weak and useless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look at this big change in my life as something bad and immediately reacted negatively to it.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see this change as A new experience, a new chapter in my life with new opportunities and ways to leant more about myself to expand myself.

I commit myself to stop the belief of me being useless - instead I realize that I am doing other things and am in fact not useless

I commit myself to stop being angry for the situation I am and realize I placed myself here and to make the best of it

I commit myself to stop looking at this change as something bad/negative just because I cant do the things I used to do and was good at - instead I take with me all that I have learnt about myself while working with the earth and be grateful for the opportunity

I commit myself to accept assistance without reacting towards it as me being useless just because I am not able to do it myself anymore

I commit myself to realize that I have a great opportunity within this change in my life to learn new things and expand myself.

Day 61 - how to work through missing someone (pt2)

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience sadness when someone leaves that has been around for a while

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience a empty feeling w ithin myself as if something went missing when somebody left me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I miss how that person made me feel

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the person makes me feel the way I do and that because they left they took something with them and now i feel something is missing

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the word missing indicates that i am missing something within myself that the other person creates when they are here and when they go it goes with them

I forgive myself that I not have accepted and allowed myself to realize that i am responsible for how i experience myself and that i created what i feel around somebody and that it is not them who creates it

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that if i am the one who creates my experiences then i create the empty feeling in myself - It os not the other person that i miss - it is the experience i created when they were here that i miss and it goes away because i believe it is the other person who made me feel this when it is only me

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that i miss someone because I have not allowed or accepted myself to give myself that which the other person showed me through their expression

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that when i miss someone i miss myself - they stand as a mirror reflecting me - and that to instead then investigate what that other person seemingly fulfills in my life and then to give it to myself

I commit myself to stop the emptiness when someone leaves

I commit myself to stop being directed by the sadness when someone leaves

I commit myself to stop the belief that its the other person who makes me feel the way I do

I commit myself to realize that i am the one who creates what i feel and experience within myself

I commit myself to realize that missing someone is me missing what that person showed me through their expression and that it is me who believes it goes with them when they leave

I commit myself to no longer deny myself what the other person is showing me and to accepted it make it my own

I commit myself to realize that others are a mirror and are a reflection of myself

I commit myself to stop the missing/emptiness/unfulfillment and to gift myself in this process of making myself whole/complete/equal and one.