Day 118 - I like Food - allot

 

I like eating food. Good tasty food. Some of the food I like eating is the following:

• Fresh bread
• Weet-bix
• pancakes
• flapjacks
• Fresh bread
• cornflakes
• Fresh bread
• Fresh bread
• Fresh bread
• Fresh bread
• Fresh bread

I do like Fresh bread. One of my favorite things to eat is fresh fresh bread just out the oven with butter - mmm. The reason im listing these foods is because Since today I stopped eating wheat foods, more specifically gluten related foods. And most the foods I like have gluten. The reason I stopped eating Gluten is part of an on going test to see what physical reaction is causing my stomach problems - im looking for the physical manifestation of my anxiety that i created.

Since I stopped eating gluten I have become very frustrated, irritated...and I little depressed. What I have noticed is that I have become sad, because food made me happy - tasty food makes me feel good and now it takes longer to make myself food.

It is interesting that now going gluten-free it takes more time to make myself food. I usually for lunch go for what is quick and easy - bread or whatever - because i dont spend too much time making it and eating it. But now I have no choice but to prepare and plan what i eat.

This is why I am frustrated and irritated - it is now more of an effort to eat and i do not like not being able to eat certain foods.

Thank you for reading - an update on this tomorrow to assist myself to not me depressed, irritated and frustrated and angry .

Day 113 - Rushing even when Eating!

 

Ok - Another point I noticed is that I am rushing while I eat - I want to eat fast so that I can get to other things  - so here follows the words to change myself to that I do not rush while I eat when it is really unnecessary.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to always be in a rush while I am eating

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am wasting my time if I do not rush when I eat

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I eat to think about all the things I still have to do  and thus I am not here

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to Breath and be here when I eat and be aware of myself by being here in the moment

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that I have no reason to rush or be in a hurry and that it is my believe that I am wasting time that I hurry when eating

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make rushing a part of my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in my fear of not having enough time to want to do everything fast

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be aware that I am rushing while I eat.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make rushing and haste  a habit where I do it with everything I do even when eating and showering when there's is not real need to be

I commit myself to when I eat to be aware of myself so that I can stop rushing  and also I breathe and be here in the moment

I commit myself to stop making rushing a part of my life and to stop being hasty all the time - instead I calm myself and be here

I commit myself to to stop the belief that I am wasting time if I eat and not rush - instead I realize that I  eating and showering is necessary

I commit myself to stop living in the future and to worry about the things I still have to do - instead I make sure I am here in the moment.

I commit myself to realize that things take time and there is nothing i an do about that - so I commit myself to stop worrying

I commit myself to when i eat to realize what had to be done for this food to be here in front of me - from the people who plowed the fields to planting the seeds and money and effort and hard work -the fuel needed for transport - the people driving and trying to make a living and the people suffering having so little - all of this so that i can have food. I commit myself to never take my food in vain.