Day 111 - Being Grumpy After a power nap

 

Today I had a 20min nap. I woke up feeling very irritated and grumpy and this always happens after short naps.

Its when I decide that I want to nap for a hour or two, but what happens most of the time I will wake up after 10 to 20 minutes and get angry about not sleeping for the amount of time I wanted. I usually wake up  feeling even more tired with a heavy feeling in my whole body and I simply cannot go back to sleep, because im very grumpy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I wake up early from a nap to be grumpy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry that i was not able to sleep for the set amount of time I allocated

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to in this grumpiness become snappy and easily snap at people in my irritation 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself  to be angry after I wake up early and not being able to go back to sleep - believing that i have wasted my time now and made matters worse since i feel more tired

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to let my anxiousness and fear of not having enough time influence me in such a way that i cannot take naps

I forgive myself that i have not accepted and allowed myself to have naps, because i fear I am wasting my time

I forgive myself that i have not accepted and allowed myself to listen to my body when it shows me I need rest, but to instead be stubborn and stay awake.

I commit myself to stop being grumpy when i wake up early from a nap - instead I breathe and go back to sleep

I commit myself to stop being angry at myself for not sleeping enough when taking a nap

I commit myself to stop being irritated and snap at people - instead I breath and make sure I do not react

I commit myself to stop the belief that I am wasting my time when I take a nap when tired

I commit myself to stop being stubborn and when my body needs sleeps i commit myself to sleep.

I commit myself to before I sleep to breathe and calm myself so that I am clear when before i sleep

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Day 101 - Anxiety Character Revisited

 

Since my last blog about anxiety it has improved allot, but what i have found is that although its less it still exist within me. Here is an extract on some of the points I worked with:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the anxiety character when somebody asks me questions about myself because i fear sharing myself to others and that i wont be able to effectively share myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I lay down on the bed to rest for a while to into this anxiety character - because I fear doing nothing and see it as wasting time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that this character is real and has power over me by controlling my actions and who i am

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the anxiety character when i am faced with a new challenge, because I fear I will not be able to walk through it not realizing that I cannot know if im able to do it or not unless i do it and find out

So since then I have found some more points to add  which will follow now:

I forgive  myself that i have accepted  and allowed myself  to live anticipating the worst thinking about all the things that could go wrong within my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the belief that if i am not perfect within who i am and what I do go into anxiety because then that means I am doing something wrong

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be here in the moment and to realize that if I always worry about the future I  am missing out on my life here now

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to at times suddenly become very anxious thing I have forgot something important when in fact i did not.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear forgetting things - especially things that are important - because If I forget it will have consequences and thus I am anxious

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to when someone says my name very loudly to go into fear and anxiety that i have done something wrong

I commit myself to stop anticipating the worst and to worry about the future , instead I bring myself here and live in moment dealing with the problems when they present themselves

I commit myself to realize that this is a process and that i am not yet perfect and it doesn't’ mean that i am doing something wrong.

I commit myself to be here in the moment so that I do not miss out on what is here now

I commit myself to stop fearing that i am forgetting things and to instead realize that if i live in the moment here i will not forget things. If im constantly worrying about the future then i will not be here and thus forget what i do here.

I commit myself to to stop allowing events to direct me life such as someone calling my voice loudly, instead i stop the anxiety